Getting over someone is never easy. In fact, it’s probably one of the hardest things we have to do in life. But fear not! If you’re struggling with heartache, we’ve got some top tips on how to deal with a break up…
Why torture yourself looking at pictures of them having a great time without you? You will end up over analysing every status update and stalking every other person in their photo that you don’t recognise; it’s all an unnecessary headache. You’re focusing on YOU at the moment, and you’re not going to get very far by checking up on your ex all the time.
Ignore any texts or calls from them for a while. You might have said you wanted to stay friends, but right now that’s not an option. Staying in contact is only going to delay the inevitable and sooner or later you’ll start thinking that getting back together is a good idea. It’s not.
Focus on their bad points
It’s easy to pretend that they were the perfect match for you, but there’s a reason you broke up. Research has shown that thinking about the other person in a negative way means you are less likely to be depressed. Remember all those things they did that really annoyed you? Wet towels on the bed, that horrible fake laugh, their bad temper? Shout it from the roof tops! You’ll soon realise what everyone else already knows – you can do a lot better.
Restore your social life
The best thing about being single is you never have to check in with someone or let someone know what you’re doing – you can just go out and do it! Being in a couple means you don’t get to see your friends as often as you did before: dates, movie nights and lazy Sundays in bed sometimes get in the way. So now is the time to get back in contact with your old pals and fill up your social calendar.
Maybe even book a holiday with a few friends? This will give you something fun to look forward to and something positive to focus on. Your friends are the best people to talk to; they’re always going to take your side and probably know exactly what you’re going through.
Change is good
Getting a new hair style after a break up might be a bit of a cliché, but that’s because it actually kind of helps (out with the old, in with the new). Get rid of the little things that remind you of them: take down the photos, change some furniture around and avoid listening to ‘our song’. Changing the little things in your life will prepare you for exciting, new things to come and will make you feel refreshed.
Remember to treat yourself! Go on a shopping spree or book that racing experience – it’s your money and you deserve it. Use the money you were saving for their birthday present and spend it on yourself!
It’s OK to be sad
Allow yourself time to grieve and don’t fight your feelings. If you want to eat a whole tub of Ben & Jerry’s or take a day off work to feel sorry for yourself – do it! You’re feeling the way you are for a reason, so just go with the emotional flow. You need to grieve in order to heal, and it’s better to let yourself do this straight away rather than be struck by it a few months down the line.
Remember though, there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. Everyone will tell you it will get better in time and you probably won’t believe them – but you WILL move on.
How do you deal with break up’s? Let us know below!